Just Breathe ~ Lessons Learned During Deployment

Just Breathe.  It's something you would never think you could forget how to do, but I have had to remind myself to breathe many times over the past 9 months.  I have learned many things over the past 9 months about myself, my marriage, my husband and my God.  I have made it my goal to remain as positive about this experience as possible.  I am a pretty determined person, and I resolved when my husband left that I could get through this, and I would do it with gusto! I hope through my personal discoveries and challenges I can help someone else out there think on these things. 

My husband left for Afghanistan on June 22, 2010.  To say this was one of the hardest days of my life is an understatement.  It was almost surreal.  We had just become parents and now my husband was leaving for an entire year.  I watched him crowd onto a hot bus.  I kept my eyes fixed on his.  I wasn't looking away until I knew he couldn't see me anymore.  The bus pulled away and I felt like my world had collapsed.  It was as horrible as it sounds watching my best friend drive away, but I am so thankful I did.  I guess I had that ultimate fear that I may never see him again (afterall he was headed to a combat zone).  Tears filled my eyes and streamed down my face.  I had to remind myself to breathe. Just breathe.  Once I took my deep breath I did the only thing I knew to do and that was pray.  I prayed right then and there for God to watch over my husband and keep him safe.  I prayed for God to help me get myself together because waiting for me at home were my precious 5 week old baby boys.

In the days following his departure, I felt sick.  It was a feeling deep in the pit of my stomach, and it felt like it would never leave.   Of course I knew that I would eventually feel better, but it was so daunting to think of the entire year we had ahead of us.  I was absolutely love sick.  Not only that, but I am sure I was still suffering from some post pregnancy hormones and sleep deprivation.  My mom wasn't able to come to help me for a few days and so I was flying solo.  Many, many times I had to remind myself to breathe.  Any time the tears came I would take a deep breath and pray.

I remember going on walks with the boys in those early days and praying the entire time. Just asking God to help me take care of my babies and bring my husband back to us as soon as possible.  I asked Him to help me be a good mother and to help me "do this" because I didn't know how.  I prayed that I COULD actually do this, and at that point I wasn't sure if I could really raise my twin boys by myself.  As we began to walk I would start to cry, but always telling myself to just breathe and then asking God for help in that moment.  I have to admit that most every day at some point I still fight tears or actual tears flow.  I am not emotionally unstable, but dealing with a tremendous helping of "life" on my plate.  Each time I am met with tears, whether or not I choose to let them flow, I always breathe and pray. 

I know my God has been my rock through this tough year.  He is the one and only "person" that has never left my side, lifted me up everyday, and led me through some of the loneliest days of my life.  I truly have felt blessed by Him and know He has answered my prayers.  That prayer I prayed on my walks with my sweet baby boys (and every time I pray for that matter), for my husband to be brought home to us as soon as possible, was answered.  My husband is returning home roughly two months early.  It brings tears to my eyes to know my God has once again taken such good care of us.  He is so good.  We know from His word that God truly takes care of His people and that "the effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much"- James 5:16.  I stand amazed at all my God has done and continues to do for me and my family.  I am forever greatful for those opportunities to just breathe and pray, and consider myself all the better for having done so.             

This is a picture of our sweet little family just before Joe left.  I love this picture and the story it tells. 

Big Deal

So excited about my big deal today and I have to say it has me feeling pretty FABULOUS!  I am a recent follower of a couple of the daily deal sites and boy are they becoming addicting. One site I am loving is www.thefoundary.com. Today, I got this new set of Calphalon Stainless Steel cookware!  

I have been needing a new set and planned on purchasing new cookware with some of our tax return money.  Did I mention these were $200 off retail?!  Very excited and ready to retire my 8 year old cookware (but hey you can't knock it if it has held in there for 8 years)!  They will be here in a few short days and I'll let you know what I think.  In the mean time you should check out a couple of these sites...here are a couple more that I have recently started stalking (a special thanks to my SIL Mandy for turning me on to them). 

 www.zulily.com
www.hautelook.com

Simple Soup

Let's face it these days I am all about short cuts!  I need quick and easy meals without sacrificing nutrition.  Soups are a great way to eat healthy, and can be super quick.  I love soup...all kinds and varieties too!  I love making a good soup from scratch, but sometimes I need something that takes no thought and is put together for me.  I just LOVE soup starter kits!  A week or so ago I had purchased this Split Pea starter and decided I would make it tonight for dinner.  If you haven't used one before it contains all the seasonings and base ingredients you need for your soup.  This one called for an additional 3/4 cup cubed ham (I found this super lean and very yummy ham steak) and an onion diced.  All I had to do was rinse the split peas, add water to my soup pot, and begin boiling.  I hadn't made a split pea soup before and after a few minutes of boiling I had to skim the foam off of the top.  This utensil worked quite well for that! 

Once it was boiling all I had to do was add the seasoning and base packets, ham, onion and simmer!  Easy "peasy" (haha!).  It was very delicious, and something I could work in to my afternoon while looking after my little monkeys.  I have tried several different soup starters and this is another of our family favorites.  I actually started making this one when I was in college!      

So this got me to thinking...are there any quick starters or soup bases you like to use?  I would love for you to share! 

In a Pinch

I was baking some sweets for my sweet soldier the other day and found myself in a little bit of a pinch.  I had already baked one batch of Chocolate Peanut Butter Chip Cookies (the recipe listed on the back of the Reese's Peanut Butter chips package...one of his favorites), and  ran out of vanilla.  I bake a lot and usually have extra in my cabinet, but I haven't exactly been on top of things lately.  I really wanted to bake a second batch of cookies...Ultimate Chocolate Chip Toffee Cookies (a Paula Deen recipe I got from my boss when I worked at a scrapbook store our first year in Clarksville). 

What was I to do?  It was snowing outside and my sweet little guys were down for a nap.  I really didn't want to go next door either...so I used my trusty sidekick...the AMAZING IPhone!  I seriously don't know what I ever did without one!  Anyway, I found out that you can substitute maple syrup teaspoon for teaspoon for vanilla extract.  I was a little skeptical, but it totally worked and I really could not tell the difference.  I also ran into another issue...rock hard brown sugar.  I remembered that you can heat up hardened brown sugar in the microwave and it will soften.  It worked like a charm! 

So a doomed batch of cookies turned out very yummy in the end, and I have to say my perseverance and intuition had me feeling pretty FABULOUS!  I also just love how therapeutic cooking is for me.  I always feel so relaxed afterward.  Especially when I have good music playing in the background...I sort of get lost in what I am doing.  Such a good feeling these days when my days are so full.  Here is the recipe for Paula's Ultimate Chocolate Chip Toffee Cookies, and I hope you'll remember these tips when you are in a pinch!

Paula's Ultimate Chocolate Chip Toffee Cookies

Taken from Paula Deen's "Chocolate Celebration"

1 1/2 c butter, softened

3/4 c sugar

1 1/2 c firmly packed brown sugar

2 tsp vanilla extract

3 large eggs

4 1/2 c all-purpose flour

1 1/2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp salt

1 8oz pkg toffee bits

1 12oz pkg semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  In a large bowl, combine butter and sugars.  Beat at medium speed until fluffy.  Beat in eggs, one at a time, beating well after each.  Beat in Vanilla.  In a medium bowl, combine flour, baking soda, and salt.  Gradually add to butter mixture, beating until combined.  Beat in toffee bits and chocolate chips.  Drop cookies by heaping tablespoons (I actually use a cookie scoop to ensure each cookie is the same size), about 2 inches apart.  Bake for 12 to 14 minutes, or until lightly browned.  Let cool on the cookie sheet for 1 or 2 minutes.  Remove to rack to cool completely.

Ready to send to my hubby in Afghanistan... I spruced my containers up a bit for Valentine's day.  I know he'll think they're fabulous! 

  

Here We Go

I can't begin to tell you how excited I am to begin this new blogging endeavor!  This is something I have wanted to begin for quite some time now.  Although I am excited, it doesn't come without a bit of nervousness.  I have been planning and designing this blog for a couple of weeks now, trying to get up the nerve to write my first post and share.  I was so pumped when I began a few weeks ago, and then doubt began to set in.  What if no one reads it?  What if I sound stupid?  Can I really write things people want to read?  But...I decided to go for it!  What's it going to hurt, right?  So here we go! 

I am a self-proclaimed Martha Stewart.  I want to do it all, all the time.  I long to make every meal from scratch with fresh veggies and herbs from my garden, sew my own table linens, whip up some invitations and decorations, and host get togethers once a week.  But the reality is that this isn't possible.  I mean really?!  Does the woman ever sleep?  (Or have a life for that matter)  The truth is that we can't do everything.  We have to learn to do what we can when we can and learn to let things go.  This has been a big accomplishment for me this year.  With a deployed husband and brand new baby boys I have definitely learned to let things go (I have also discovered  A LOT of things about myself this year...but that's for another post).  Things are not always pretty around here and I am quite certain there are days that I have totally forgotten to brush my teeth.  It all works out because I do what I can when I can.  I've learned that I can still be fabulous even if I don't do everything.  I in no way, shape or form consider myself truly fabulous, but I sure wish I was.  I am no different than any other wife or mother out there simply wishing to do everything "right".  I have decided being fabulous is a state of mind, you are what you eat kind of thing.  Anyone can achieve fabulousness.

Now, I know I just criticized Martha for trying to do everything and I have to say...I'm a bit guilty of trying to do it all.  I dabble in just about anything related to the home and crafting.  This blog is mine, and so it will be just like me...all over the place.  Not in a bad way, but in the sense that I plan on sharing a whole host of random tidbits.  I hope to share household tips, recipes, encouragements, crafty projects, decorating projects and sometimes just my thoughts.  I hope you'll join in the fun as I strive to be Domestically Fabulous!